Freeflys, Women's Freebies, b Savings, freebie websites in general (a Cheerier blog)

For the most part I'm pretty savvy about internet scams. I know you can't win an iPad for just sharing a picture on Facebook and all that jazz. But even I sometimes fail! A friend suggested I check out the Facebook page Freeflys. So I checked out the website and attempted to join because it looked legit. First of all, the website wouldn't accept my address as valid and it took 3 weeks emailing back and forth with their webmaster to get it straight. At one point the webmaster quite honestly said to me "It's not a valid address, it doesn't exist according to the USPS!" to which I replied "Fucking idiot, how have I lived here for almost 3 years and receive mail here every day of the week if it isn't a valid fucking address????" Eventually it all got cleared up.

From Freeflys I was introduced to Women's Freebies, b savings and a couple others. I signed up for quite a few freebie samples and even was surprised to find out allot of companies offer full size samples, pretty cool huh?

Then I got an ugly wake up call to reality. My first sample was of Kate Spade perfume. Suffice to say, you get bigger perfume samples from magazines. I'm not kidding, it was a cardboard swab of perfume no bigger than a matchbook!!!

Okay, well I thought maybe it's a fluke. It took over 6 weeks for that sample to arrive even though I had been requesting freebies for a month steady. 4 weeks after the perfume debacle, yesterday to be exact. The mailman rang the bell and handed me two packages, 1 tiny and 1 really good size. About the size of a decent paperback. I was so super excited!!! Oooooohhhh, is it nail polish, my burt's bees lip glosses, lotion, what treasures could this decent size box be hiding??? Could hardly contain my glee as I ripped open this wonderful box!!!

A FULL SIZE SAMPLE!!!

Of maxi pads.

Fucking Maxi Pads! Seriously, really!?!

I have since deleted all those stupid websites.

LOL!!

Till Next Time, Faithful Readers,

BEX, nothing in this life is free readers!!!

Temporary

I was doing allot of thinking on Saturday because something was bothering me. There's a person in my life that when they're upset, they will find any way possible to pick a fight for no reason. Generally I'm observant enough to see it coming and make a hasty exit before I become the target however this time against my better judgment I stayed. Now as a rule, someone picking a fight with me for NO reason except that I'm physically there, aggravates me in a big way and I'll react to it. Now someone starting a fight with me for no reason and then calling me a liar, that's recipe for disaster.

So now you have the context that you need to understand why I'm writing this blog. I had over a day to think about it and this is what I came up with. I hope you take something away from this, Faithful Readers.

Temporary. Generally when you think of temporary, you think rather negatively "Oh, it won't be here forever so I won't put forth the effort!" but when you stop and think about it, really think about it, nothing is permanent in this world. Not even life is permanent, no one lives forever and no one gets out alive. It's temporary, long term but still temporary.

Likes, dislikes, success, failure, hard times, good times, laughter, tears, broken hearts, messiness, cleanliness, shyness, friendships, enemies, jobs, families, beauty, ugliness, even Love.

Everything in this world is temporary and is not meant to last. What your feeling right now in your life, will pass to something different. What your doing in and with your life right now, will pass to a whole different situation. Everything changes, that's the way of Nature. There is a duality in Nature that exists even in our lives.

I believe after having given this some serious thought, that once we realize how very temporary all aspects of our lives and even our lives themselves are, it gives us the perspective we need to live a better more fulfilling existence while we are here.

Arguments and fights no longer matter, walk away from it and LET IT GO. Hard times don't last, wait it out because the Sun will shine again. Your heart is broken in to a million tiny shards but your still breathing and will find love again. Whatever hurts now will heal with time and the scars that you carry with you are reminders to not make that mistake again.

All eventually passes into something new, Faithful Readers.

Till Next Time,
BEX the ever evolving.

Complete Nonsense

There will be no point, no plot, no outline, rhyme or reason to this particular blog. If it gets finished Faithful Reader, you will read it and say to yourself "I just read 10 minutes of my life away for no particular reason!" but I am completely certain you may get a giggle or 2 out of it and maybe even a small life lesson from my many mistakes.

Last week was fraught with some serious drama. I lost my temper completely at least 3 times, I mean seriously straight to the point, snapped! That is not the person that I currently am. When I was younger I fought constantly, finished the bullshit others started and let my temper control me. As the years have passed, I've learned to control myself with the realization that negative energy begets negative results, life is too short to let bullshit rule your world. Now with that being said let's revisit the fact that I managed to lose my composure on more than one occasion in a really short period of time! I am a fierce person when it comes to the people and things that I truly love but I am also intelligent enough to realize when people are just trying to start shitty drama because they are jealous and petty. Generally that knowledge makes it easy to shrug it off and walk away with out another thought. This was not one of those times. I am happy at the outcome and want to send a heartfelt Thank You to the envious ass-monkey's that tried to disrupt and dismantle and generally demolish my life and happiness! Thank You!! You showed me how strong I am, how strong my relationship is and how much love is in my world from my man and from friends that are willing to show up at my house in 2 minutes and drive me to beat the ever livin' hell outta somebody, no questions asked! I have solidity in my world that you showed to me and reminded me how lucky and blessed I really, truly am.

Of course dealing with that kind of nonsense leaves a person emotionally exhausted, my man was home for extra days this week so together we had to accomplish as much as possible in a short period of time before he left town again and me and my bestie have plans early for the next 2 days so I have officially declared a non-day in Bex World. A non-day is a day that does not exist, you skip it entirely. No chores, no routine, no running around, no outside contact, no nothing. I am sitting in my sweats watching a season of Shameless, sipping cold coffee with no plans and I am strangely okay with having no aspirations today. I was up at 4:30 AM until 8 AM and only slept for 2 more hours so any motivation I would have had was lost.

So let's wander through some Random, just you and I!

On my work space and in my purse you will always find a notebook because I get random thoughts for blogs and if I don't write it down right away I lose the thought completely. LOL, sometimes this little practice of writing down random, errant thought patterns backfires on me. I write down the initial thought but forget to write down exactly where that thought was suppose to be going! So I end up with a page of truly random half sentences, words, numbers.

This is always sitting next to my computer!

 Which isn't bad except when someone not use to my erratic thought patterns, happens by and reads what is on the page. On the left side of the page in big letters it reads "You are not Gay, you are financially frustrated" Now at the time this was written down, I was about 8 beers deep, Mav and I were talking about God knows what and he said this. At the time, I remember laughing and going "Hell yeah, that's an awesome blog!" However, I failed to write down the context of this statement and where it was supposed to be heading, now I have a slightly offensive bit of nonsense that I have no explanation for. Thankfully this doesn't happen very often, B was in my room reading my wall of post it note ideas and thoughts and I was able to explain each and every one. But there's always that exception and somehow it always ends up being something off the wall, offensive or disgusting. Damn!

As creative and chaotic as my personality is, I am a creature of habit. I find certain things reassuring, relaxing, comforting. These tiny things calm my inner turmoil, slow my mind and put me at ease. But, like me, are so completely left field that you will laugh at them! 

Repetition. Not like OCD check the door lock 3 times, repetition of entertainment sources. I will re-read the same books over and over. Again not like "Hey, it's been 2 years and I haven't read this book!" more like I just read the last page and I begin it again immediately. I liken it to visiting a comfortable place. If I like the story it becomes forever a "Comfortable Place" a friendly, happy land for my imagination, where I am happy. Doesn't matter how often I read the story it's always a happy escape and reassuring that no matter what changes in my world, that world in my imagination remains the same. Television is another source of my entertainment repetition. Shows like Shameless, Trailer Park Boys, True Blood, Breaking Bad, Deadwood, Sons Of Anarchy, I re-watch these shows obsessively! Problem is that I have to start Season 1 Episode 1 and can't stop until I'm at the end of all available episodes. When I got up this morning at 4:30, B was watching Shameless, had just started it and now I am on Season 3 Episode 2!! I'm stuck in the land of the Gallaghers for the day!!

Routine. Even I don't notice that I do it until it's pointed out to me by ME, LOL!!! Normal people have routines so your asking yourself why this would seem odd to me or even funny to you. It's not so much the routine itself that's odd as my reaction to the routine itself or more importantly my reaction to missing a step in the routine. 

I could honestly care less if the house is a bit messy or cluttered when I leave for the day, Ian's chores are  trash and dishes so no need to worry about that, B will pick up, no worries there. I can not physically leave my house without making my bed, I have a panic attack quite literally. 2 years ago this little piece of OCD was nonexistent. I have never once in my life cared whether or not the bed was made! It just started one random day, weird huh? Even on non-days when I'm home, I can't let the bed go unmade for more than an hour after I get up! Never noticed until today that on the day Mav goes back to work, I watch 1 of my shows and absolutely have to eat steak and eggs at some point. Always steak and eggs, every single time he leaves for work! I just noticed this little routine because I was cooking it and actually stopped to consider it. It kinda freaked me out that I have been doing this for months and just realized it, really freaked me out because I was writing this blog and in the back of my head it was bothering me that there was something I was missing and didn't feel at ease until I was standing there flipping fried eggs!

It's a non-day, don't judge!

Never truly understand how weird my life is until I write it down for other people to read. Going to leave you with this real life true story event that honest to God did occur and if you have something more strangely random than this event I want to hear about it!!

I was standing in a trailer park, wearing a cocktail length fox fur coat, in front of a campfire, drinking a PBR, watching paint dry!

Till Next Time Faithful Readers, 

BEX :)

We have become our parents and not in a good way!

I periodically kind of misplace my muse and end up not writing for a couple of months and Faithful Readers, I'm not going to apologize as I usually do because I'm pretty certain that you understand!! I have missed this time together and once again promise that I will try harder!!

Fast update: I was in the running for a Bi-line of my own and unfortunately did not get it, I came in second. However, I will still continue to write for them and on a steadier schedule than I have been. Because of that and they even considered me, I know that I am on their radar and I'm calling it a major win!! I'll get there when the time is right, I have faith!

So, yeah, this among a couple of other things got me down for a minute. No worries though, I'm back to normal punktacular, fabulousity!!! But it did put me in total slacker mode there for a minute, which does have it's plus sides but I am an active person so I don't generally like spending that much time inside my own head. It can be a deeply disturbing place at times, let's face it I have a tendency to over analyze EVERYTHING!! And given unlimited time inside my own head, I will successfully drive myself batty over the tiniest of things. The plus side of this introspective was that I sat and gave serious thought to a couple of things that kind of annoy me.

We have successfully turned into our parents as a generation, for the most part. I'm 38 years old, I grew up in the 80's and 90's. I had a jean jacket with a Pink Floyd back patch, the front was covered with every pin I could find for every metal/thrash band I loved, I wore Adidas Hi-tops, torn jeans, tye dye t-shirts and bleached the ever livin piss out of my jet black hair in the 90's, I had 4 Swatch watches on one arm, jelly bracelets up to my elbow on the other, huge hair, leggings and one shoulder NEON shirts in the 80's. My parent's constantly were on my ass about how I dressed, no matter what decade! But it was worse when I was in high school and going through my Metal, Punk, Skater look with that jean jacket, torn jeans, hi-tops all scuffed too hell and Manic Panic streaks in my hair! My dad would constantly tell me that even though it wasn't fair, people would look at how I presented myself dressing that way and judge me. "Dress like a slacker punk and people will assume you are a slacker punk! Bec, your too smart for that!" my dad would say every day before school.

One day I got curious and I asked my Gram about my dad when he was going to high school. Asked her straight out what she thought about how he dressed in school. My gram went on a rant for an hour, no joke. She hated his tight dungarees with the ridiculous flared legs, the madras shirts, the platform boots, Gram said it was an ongoing fight every single day about what he chose to wear.

Every generation is going to hate what the newer generation is wearing, doing, their music, everything. It's inevitable.

I personally have never gotten on my boys too much or often about how they choose to dress. C'mon, I have neon pink hair and dress in what I think looks good, so who am I to suppress their individuality and expression? Although we do have a rule in this house that if you look straight up fucktarded in that outfit your not getting out the door! B checks me before I leave and I check him and Ian, if something doesn't look right, back to the closet you go!!

Everyone has the right to their opinion, my point is this: Your parent's didn't like everything you wore growing up, remember that the next time you see some kid sportin' low hanging jeans, a t-shirt 12 times too big and sideways flat brim baseball cap. You don't like it, don't fucking wear it, simple as that. Stop being so damn judgmental about how the youth of today is dressing, the next time you see some kid on a skateboard with baggy ass jeans hangin' low, a white wife beater and a DC cap on sideways and you want to be all snotty and high and mighty about it I want you to stop and think of 2 things 1) WTF did you look like in your yearbook??? 2) You have a friend that is 38 with PINK HAIR!!!!  I have personally been out different places with allot of you, I've seen how defensive you all can get the second someone looks at me snotty about my hair, I'm sure that kid with the jeans feels the same damn way when you look at him snotty!!! And if stopping and thinking about those 2 points don't stop you from being a judgmental fucktwat, I want you to think of this instead "You sound like YOUR Dad/Mother!" don't know about you but nothing stops me in my tracks faster than sounding like my parents!!

Yesterday was a beautiful day here in Syracuse, high temps, sunny, perfect! My buddy Nicole lives nearby and has a fabulous backyard so I decided to go chill with her. Realizing what a craptastic winter we had, it came to me that I haven't worked out or jogged since October! Usually I'm pretty good at keeping a routine but working seasonally, my man coming home from working out of state, well let's just say the excuses are many, LOL!! So I jogged the 1.5 miles to Nic's place. Only had to stop and walk once!! WOOHOO BEX!! I still got it I thought to myself, so when I got home I went to our onsite gym and worked my ass out for an hour! Came home and ate a salad! Feeling all proud and puffed up about myself.......until this morning. My arms are killing me just typing this blog! Everything is sore as hell!! The funny part is that by looking at me, you'd honestly wonder why? I'm perfectly proportioned for my height, I'm not over weight but I'm not a triscuit a week supermodel skinny, I have a very athletic build! Evidently the muscle I have was still napping and woke up in a snit! Taking today off but hitting that gym again tomorrow damn it so those muscles better realize that nap time is over!!

Alright Faithful Readers, there are beers that need drinking and dinner that unfortunately will not cook itself
(weren't we promised replecators by now???)

Till Next Time,

BEX