People have again and again asked me what I'm talking about when I say that Murphy is kicking my ass. Now I know at some point I have already blogged about this so my only explanation is that people are either not listening to me or they are all illiterate.
"Murphy's Laws 1. Anything that can go wrong will go wrong"
There are many differing views on where the list of Murphy's laws came from and who first uttered them but I believe in Murphy as an unseen force in the Universe. I'm not here to argue the origins of Murphy. To me, Murphy is the definition of Irish Luck. Sure everything will work out in the end but it will take the most fucked up, damage causing route possible. It's the Universal truth that anything that can go wrong WILL indeed go wrong.
Now most normal human beings on the planet only get a taste of Murphy's sick sense of humor once, maybe twice. Me? I get to Share my life with this twisted, imaginary bastard. There are 3 factors that directly play into my life with Murphy. 1. How long a period have I gone without something going wrong? 2. How long has everything been going according to plan and/or how happy am I? 3. How broke am I in direct proportion to how much Murphy's damage could cause me monetarily? Add all 3 of these together,shake,serve in a chilled pint glass and there you have it, a recipe for a perfect disaster! Or better known as a day in Bex life!
Now I know that there are those of you out there in the 'Verse that are cynical, non-believers. You will say that I am being paranoid or trying to justify my shortcomings on an unseen force. You will say that I bring these events on myself by my own bad decisions.
I answer this very simply by saying you obviously don't know me very well and I dare you to spend a 48 hour period with me. Although I will warn you that Murphy may take notice of you by your association with me and I'm not responsible for any damages that may occur due to this association. As Cameron so succinctly put it the other night, I am not the exception to the rule I am my own rule. And no other rules apply.
My Christmas went really really well, the week leading up to the holiday went really really well with exception to the broken finger/manager from hell debacle that really wasn't a debacle at all, just a small dose of Murphy, tiny by comparison to what was waiting for me. Honestly, except for some minor turbulence the past 2 months haven't been that bad. And the past couple weeks have been positively fabulous.
Here's an example of Murphy in direct coalition with my life. Yesterday I jumped in the truck to go pay a bill, as I was driving I noticed my dashboard suddenly got brighter. Check Gauges light popped on (never seen that one before) looked at the dash and my temperature gauge is red lining (going all the way in to the red, for my non-mechanically inclined readers) and suddenly there's no heat in the truck. I immediately think thermostat, heater core, obvious stuff. I got home as quickly as possible, parked the truck and just shook my head at her. *Sigh* Of course this would happen, it's been 2 weeks since anything was wrong with Bella and my repair bill is paid up. *Heavier Sigh*. All morning today I've been trying to reach Shorty at the garage and all morning I haven't been able to get through. Finally my friend Nate drove by there and called and informed me the shop has a closed till further notice sign on the door. He thinks they're doing some sort of renovation (I hope) but no idea when it should be open again. Now as if that wasn't bad enough, Nate decides to be possessed by the spirit of Murphy. In the demonic voice of my unseen destroyer, not considering that his words are crushing my soul and wiping out my very will to exist. In the cheeriest voice your imagination can summon, Nate decides to start listing all the possibilities of things that are wrong with the truck alphabetically from bad to apocalyptic to drink the cyanide laced kool aid now, thank you sir may I have another? There is no *sigh* inserted here because I'm hyperventilating in the worst panic attack I've ever had!!
Murphy directed me to buy a cursed truck. Cursed I tell you, Cursed!! Not ordinary cursed, not by a long shot. CURSED! By some unknown,ancient,indestructible,incurable entity that no amount of exorcism or blessing by any known religion will cast it from my Blazer! CURSED! *SIGH*
One valuable lesson that living with Murphy has taught me, Breathe and laugh at the amount of truly horrible luck I possess. Because if you don't learn to laugh at yourself amongst these circumstances so extraordinary, you will lose it.
However as stated to a friend today, Someday I'm going to accidently cross paths with a man named Murphy and on that day I am going to snap and fucking lose it on that poor unsuspecting stranger.
Till next time faithful readers,
BEX
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
I'm not sure I like where this is going
My holidays were good this year. I got a bunch of cool stuff, the boys were both happy with what they got. My Mom was super happy! We gave her a gift certificate to the salon that I use and yesterday she went and got her hair cut and got it frosted, it looks wonderful! She even bought herself makeup! Slowly her self esteem is coming back and that makes me happier than anything else this holiday season. It makes me feel good to see her feel good.
I'm at a weird spot in life right now. I'm happy to be done with that stupid job, I love my new smart phone and the fact that I'm with a real service again, I'm excited looking forward to spending some time with my friends, and seeing my dad in 2 weeks. There's a ton of stuff going on in my world in the next few weeks so I'll be busy but having fun. But my emotions are a hot mess. There's a lot of confusion and a lot of turmoil happening there. I was going to say that I don't know what to do about it but after reading my own words, I realize it's just a matter of taking a breath and relaxing. I only make things worse when I stress and make it out to be a bigger thing than it is.
I am looking forward to this new year coming up! I have a couple things to keep me busy and I'm making a conscience effort to work on them and not just let my ideas fall to the side this time. I'm going to take some chances this year, real chances not chances involving alcohol poisoning. Going to put my energy into constructive endeavors and not just recklessness. If I can get all my ducks in a row, it'll be a good year! And if I can't than I'll go back to being reckless and it'll still be a good year lol!
I hope all of my Faithful Readers had a great holiday and I hope you all have a wonderful New Year! Remember to keep reading in 2011!!!
Till next time,
BEX!
I'm at a weird spot in life right now. I'm happy to be done with that stupid job, I love my new smart phone and the fact that I'm with a real service again, I'm excited looking forward to spending some time with my friends, and seeing my dad in 2 weeks. There's a ton of stuff going on in my world in the next few weeks so I'll be busy but having fun. But my emotions are a hot mess. There's a lot of confusion and a lot of turmoil happening there. I was going to say that I don't know what to do about it but after reading my own words, I realize it's just a matter of taking a breath and relaxing. I only make things worse when I stress and make it out to be a bigger thing than it is.
I am looking forward to this new year coming up! I have a couple things to keep me busy and I'm making a conscience effort to work on them and not just let my ideas fall to the side this time. I'm going to take some chances this year, real chances not chances involving alcohol poisoning. Going to put my energy into constructive endeavors and not just recklessness. If I can get all my ducks in a row, it'll be a good year! And if I can't than I'll go back to being reckless and it'll still be a good year lol!
I hope all of my Faithful Readers had a great holiday and I hope you all have a wonderful New Year! Remember to keep reading in 2011!!!
Till next time,
BEX!
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Manners, being considerate and things that have caught my attention
Admittedly there are things that I am obsessively snotty about, I won't use anything but Bath & Bodyworks sprays and lotions, I hate using a smaller cell service, some products I will not purchase unless it's a major brand. But there are other things that REALLY make my snotty ass attitude come out full force, the biggest one being manners, being considerate and common courtesy. I will tear someone down in public, I will humiliate you and make you ashamed for yourself for these transgressions. I am astonished by the lack of manners and common courtesy in the world! Why are my son's generations not being taught these simple rules for how to act in public? Why as parents have you not taught your children something simple such as "Please, Thank you, Your Welcome and the one that really gets me, Excuse me" Is it so difficult to say Excuse me when passing someone in close proximity??? And I would love to just pin this on the younger generation but truth be told it's not just them, I watched a woman in her 40's do this in a store recently. She knocked right into a pregnant girl and never once looked at her and said excuse me, I'm sorry. We, the American culture, have no instinct towards being polite at all. I've been all over the world and back again and never witnessed once the complete lack of social skills that we display in public. I am pleading with the public, do not leave your house unless you fully intend on at least using a minimum of politeness and courtesy. Hold the door for someone, say Thank you, please, your welcome, excuse me, let someone with less items go ahead of you, be aware of the senior citizens, mommies to be, moms w/ little kids etc. BE POLITE!! I promise it won't fucking kill you, you will not experience spontaneous combustion in your mouth for using nice polite words! The world will not collapse because you teach your curtain climbing mouth breathers to hold a door for an old lady!! Think of how much nicer it would be to go out to the mall, movies, bar, anywhere actually if we all just pulled out our manners? Do it just for that self centered reason, to make it more pleasant for yourself if doing it for the general public is too much to ask for from such an upstanding citizen such as yourself.
Most people will think that being considerate falls under the tirade of using your manners and it does to an extent but I'm going to be a bit more specific. In the past week I've come across 2 glowing examples of idiotic morons that have not only not been taught common courtesy but seriously lack common fucking sense to stop and think about what they're doing and be considerate towards others!! Really, this disturbs me on the most basic, core level of my being as a member of the human race. I know that intelligence isn't a thing that we can give out however, common courtesy is that little thing that makes you stop and think about your actions and how they affect other people around you is it so hard for people to do this?? Why, Why is it so hard? I'm not going to go into explanations because it would cause drama and I DO NOT ACCEPT DRAMA but I will say this, Some people better understand to pay closer attention to their own houses before disrupting mine. Throwing out an apology and then acting without consideration right after, does not make it all better it just makes your true colors of mouth breather show through brightly and clearly for the world to see. And stupid is not a color that looks good on any one.
The second shining example of twat this week was a combination of make me laugh because you took yourself seriously and wonderment at the lack of common sense. My job is to go in and rearrange stock rooms and re-inventory all the items within. I like manual labor jobs, it's no secret that I love the sense of accomplishment that comes from these types of jobs and this one was cool because it was like working a great big room sized puzzle. I ran out and got this job literally. It took me 24 hours. I didn't really want a job but I figured that getting something small and part time to get me out of the house would be cool. And I got pressured into it by 2 people that said repeatedly I needed to. Back to the story. So I rearranged this 1 storeroom full of sporting goods and weight sets. Took me a week of busting my ass but it's a beautiful little room now. Instead of saying "hey good job, looks good" the midget, bi-furious, man hating, angry little gnome of an assistant manager came in and threw a hissy fit. I showed her that on the shelving units the products behind the ones in front were the same as the ones behind thus making it even easier to find something even though it's all listed in individual sections labeled on the shelves and in the hand held computers. Hostile, man hating, pretend lesbian went ballistic swearing that it was too complicated and no one would be able to find anything but this section is her section and she let's no one else in there so in essence she's saying that she's too stupid to find anything in the simple, crayon written organization. OUTSTANDING award for stupidity this week goes to Michelle! Oh wait it gets better, she also gets this weeks EXEMPLARY award in lack of social/management skills! Yep went in on friday after going to the emergency room and getting my finger all splinted up to give her a note from the hospital saying that I was not to work for 1 day. Michelle then threw one of her fun bi-furious hissy fits because and I quote "What the hell 1 day do they mean??" my answer(in true Bex form) "Next thursday. Seriously the next day I work" I stood there wondering if I really just had to explain that to someone in management, did that just happen?? My angry little gay-tend (gay pretend) gnome then decided it was okay to start raising her voice at me, telling me that someone else on staff broke their finger and was working through it and she didn't accept my doctors note and "I can't believe you had me called all the way up to the service desk it's your job to find me!". I couldn't decide if I should slap her or laugh at her, I ended up laughing at her. For more reasons than the above, I blew today off and I'm on a mission to get fired in the next 24 hours. It's a fun mission and just in time for Christmas and New Years, SWEET!! If they don't pull me in and let me go first thing tomorrow, I'm going to be as annoying, snotty, sarcastic, confrontational and pretentious as only Bex can be! Level 15 on the Bex aggravating scale. Expect to hear from me early tomorrow.
Time for current events! 3 things have really caught me this week. 1. The Royals!! Oh how I love the Brtish Royal family! I do I do, they are one of my favorite obsessions. Princess Diana wedded Prince Charles I was allowed to stay home from school to watch, same with Prince Andrew and Fergie the Duchess of York. I could go on and on about the Royals. Prince William marrying Kate is too cool for many reasons, I am excited for them and wish them mountains of happiness from my heart and soul. And because of the decision to snub President and Mrs. Obama from the guest list, I love the Royals more! If this little move doesn't magnify how little this President is respected, I don't know what will. Guess what Obama, Presidency doesn't buy you world wide respect and your idiot wife should've been slapped for touching, let alone hugging THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND! I'm an idiot commoner from Upstate New York and I know better than to touch a member of the Royal Freaking Family. I'm so glad they didn't get invited, it'd be like letting your trashy inbred cousin crash your wedding! Also, am I the only one that got a big laugh out of the picture of Camilla and Charles' car getting battered by angry protesters? She looked like a big frog or a big mouthed Bass out of water, lmao!
2. Veteran Kayaker gets eaten by giant crocodile in Congo, Africa. Hhhmm, didn't see that coming. Don't even have to comment on this one it speaks for itself.
3. Sheriff Grady Judd from Polk County, Florida is the ballsiest man on the planet! A man wrote a book, a how to for pedophiles. Literally, not kidding, google it. He lives in Colorado. Judd's agency sent a request to purchase this book directly from the author and then charged him with trafficking pornography/offensive material involving children and other stuff. No one else in this country has worked to find a loop hole to snag this disgusting child raper and everyone is afraid to step on this individuals freedom of speech rights, not Sheriff Judd! He said "If the other 49 States don't have a law in place for these people, we do!" I say Congratulations Sir! You keep doing shit like this and run for President, I'll vote for ya Judd! Love itloveitloveitloveitloveitloveitLOVEIT!!
Till Next Time Faithful Readers,
BEX!
Most people will think that being considerate falls under the tirade of using your manners and it does to an extent but I'm going to be a bit more specific. In the past week I've come across 2 glowing examples of idiotic morons that have not only not been taught common courtesy but seriously lack common fucking sense to stop and think about what they're doing and be considerate towards others!! Really, this disturbs me on the most basic, core level of my being as a member of the human race. I know that intelligence isn't a thing that we can give out however, common courtesy is that little thing that makes you stop and think about your actions and how they affect other people around you is it so hard for people to do this?? Why, Why is it so hard? I'm not going to go into explanations because it would cause drama and I DO NOT ACCEPT DRAMA but I will say this, Some people better understand to pay closer attention to their own houses before disrupting mine. Throwing out an apology and then acting without consideration right after, does not make it all better it just makes your true colors of mouth breather show through brightly and clearly for the world to see. And stupid is not a color that looks good on any one.
The second shining example of twat this week was a combination of make me laugh because you took yourself seriously and wonderment at the lack of common sense. My job is to go in and rearrange stock rooms and re-inventory all the items within. I like manual labor jobs, it's no secret that I love the sense of accomplishment that comes from these types of jobs and this one was cool because it was like working a great big room sized puzzle. I ran out and got this job literally. It took me 24 hours. I didn't really want a job but I figured that getting something small and part time to get me out of the house would be cool. And I got pressured into it by 2 people that said repeatedly I needed to. Back to the story. So I rearranged this 1 storeroom full of sporting goods and weight sets. Took me a week of busting my ass but it's a beautiful little room now. Instead of saying "hey good job, looks good" the midget, bi-furious, man hating, angry little gnome of an assistant manager came in and threw a hissy fit. I showed her that on the shelving units the products behind the ones in front were the same as the ones behind thus making it even easier to find something even though it's all listed in individual sections labeled on the shelves and in the hand held computers. Hostile, man hating, pretend lesbian went ballistic swearing that it was too complicated and no one would be able to find anything but this section is her section and she let's no one else in there so in essence she's saying that she's too stupid to find anything in the simple, crayon written organization. OUTSTANDING award for stupidity this week goes to Michelle! Oh wait it gets better, she also gets this weeks EXEMPLARY award in lack of social/management skills! Yep went in on friday after going to the emergency room and getting my finger all splinted up to give her a note from the hospital saying that I was not to work for 1 day. Michelle then threw one of her fun bi-furious hissy fits because and I quote "What the hell 1 day do they mean??" my answer(in true Bex form) "Next thursday. Seriously the next day I work" I stood there wondering if I really just had to explain that to someone in management, did that just happen?? My angry little gay-tend (gay pretend) gnome then decided it was okay to start raising her voice at me, telling me that someone else on staff broke their finger and was working through it and she didn't accept my doctors note and "I can't believe you had me called all the way up to the service desk it's your job to find me!". I couldn't decide if I should slap her or laugh at her, I ended up laughing at her. For more reasons than the above, I blew today off and I'm on a mission to get fired in the next 24 hours. It's a fun mission and just in time for Christmas and New Years, SWEET!! If they don't pull me in and let me go first thing tomorrow, I'm going to be as annoying, snotty, sarcastic, confrontational and pretentious as only Bex can be! Level 15 on the Bex aggravating scale. Expect to hear from me early tomorrow.
Time for current events! 3 things have really caught me this week. 1. The Royals!! Oh how I love the Brtish Royal family! I do I do, they are one of my favorite obsessions. Princess Diana wedded Prince Charles I was allowed to stay home from school to watch, same with Prince Andrew and Fergie the Duchess of York. I could go on and on about the Royals. Prince William marrying Kate is too cool for many reasons, I am excited for them and wish them mountains of happiness from my heart and soul. And because of the decision to snub President and Mrs. Obama from the guest list, I love the Royals more! If this little move doesn't magnify how little this President is respected, I don't know what will. Guess what Obama, Presidency doesn't buy you world wide respect and your idiot wife should've been slapped for touching, let alone hugging THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND! I'm an idiot commoner from Upstate New York and I know better than to touch a member of the Royal Freaking Family. I'm so glad they didn't get invited, it'd be like letting your trashy inbred cousin crash your wedding! Also, am I the only one that got a big laugh out of the picture of Camilla and Charles' car getting battered by angry protesters? She looked like a big frog or a big mouthed Bass out of water, lmao!
2. Veteran Kayaker gets eaten by giant crocodile in Congo, Africa. Hhhmm, didn't see that coming. Don't even have to comment on this one it speaks for itself.
3. Sheriff Grady Judd from Polk County, Florida is the ballsiest man on the planet! A man wrote a book, a how to for pedophiles. Literally, not kidding, google it. He lives in Colorado. Judd's agency sent a request to purchase this book directly from the author and then charged him with trafficking pornography/offensive material involving children and other stuff. No one else in this country has worked to find a loop hole to snag this disgusting child raper and everyone is afraid to step on this individuals freedom of speech rights, not Sheriff Judd! He said "If the other 49 States don't have a law in place for these people, we do!" I say Congratulations Sir! You keep doing shit like this and run for President, I'll vote for ya Judd! Love itloveitloveitloveitloveitloveitLOVEIT!!
Till Next Time Faithful Readers,
BEX!
Friday, December 17, 2010
Christmas,Boys not Men and stupid crap NY State does
Ok back to my usual no nonsense way of looking at the world, Faithful Readers!
Christmas changed for me somewhere down the line. I was that kid that was up at 4 am waiting for 6 am to come because that was the designated earliest time Dad would allow. It didn't matter how much was under the tree but somehow my parents always spoiled the hell out of me at Christmas. My whole family did. I guess I've become an Adult in some ways. Because I tell everyone not to get me presents, mostly because I am a single mom and I can't afford to get everyone gifts. But it's more that that. I am honestly happy just being able to spend an evening with my friends, hanging out with everyone is gift enough for me. I like seeing everyone happy and joking around and that is enough present for me. These quiet moments in the morning and late at night, I sit alone in the living room and the apartment is all mine I get to look at my Christmas Tree. The past 2 years have been financially bad and Christmas was no exception so I haven't had my usual decorations. But this year I could and that to me is my Merry Christmas. Seeing my tree all decorated pretty, with my shiny pink, purple and green balls and our special ornaments that are indicitive of our differing personalities. That makes me happy, really really. I'm almost sad that it will end and I'll have to take it down because my living room looks so nice!
Enough with the happy. Recently as all have been aware, I went on a mission to find me a relationship. Those that know me well enough, you will rejoice in the knowledge that I have thrown this mission in the trash where it belongs! Seriously, enough of that bullshit I'm so insanely over that crap. I know that Big Dave, Fred, Dave, Garcia and Darius will have something to say as soon as I post this once they read this little blurb that I'm about to write. I tried to present a more demure, less aggressive, cuddlier Bex in my quest for a significant other(Yep gonna catch Hell for that one line) But do you know what that got me? That got me 3 different sets of games being played, 1 ass monkey that truly underestimated how much I see through bullshit, blown off by 2 different guys and 1 idiot savant stalker. Really?? Seriously?? Now I admit that I brought a lot of this on myself by trying to be a subdued Bex, so in the general pool of twats that I had I could understand how they would make the mistake of thinking that I was just another girl like any other. But little do they know, I'm not. I'm Bex. Here's what I've discovered in my undercover work (that's what we're deluding ourselves into believing this was) I discovered that in the demographic of men on dating sites and in the general public ages 25-40, there are actually no men at all. It's all boys, not men. Finding Men in this demographic is equivalent to finding the golden ticket! There's the one group of boys that say they're looking for the a relationship but they treat every female like a trick, the group that's out to find someone but can't help playing head games, the group that wants to ask about marriage on the first date, the group that would love to meet you but then never make plans to, and the group that sees the potential in a girl and then promptly runs away. How does anyone find someone in that hot mess?? This whole demographic is nothing but a bunch of boys playing little boy games with no respect for themselves or anyone else. I don't have time for all that crap. I think I'm happier writing snarkey, cynical crap about all of you couples rather than trying to join your ranks!
Stupid crap that New York State does, or why my dead ex-husband is getting notices at my address. Now I'm sure this happens in every state but I live in NY and this happened here. A few months ago I got a letter from NYS Child Support Enforcement stating that after 4 years they were going after my ex-husband full force for support. I called and left a message on their little hot line and then sent them an email notifying them of Michael's death. 2 weeks later I got another letter from them stating that they would update their records and then I notice that they sent a letter addressed to Michael. In the letter they tell him basically that he owes $5,000 in support and this is unacceptable however your deceased so we'll let it go. Yesterday I get a letter to Michael notifying him that the warrant and lien against him is being dismissed because he's deceased! So let's all get this straight in our heads and try to make sense of this. NYS is notifying a DEAD guy that he owes child support but they're dismissing it because he's DEAD and they're notifying the DEAD guy by mail. Congratulations tax payers, there's your money! And it's not like this is a one time thing, this has gone on for months!
Till next time Faithful Readers,
BEX
Christmas changed for me somewhere down the line. I was that kid that was up at 4 am waiting for 6 am to come because that was the designated earliest time Dad would allow. It didn't matter how much was under the tree but somehow my parents always spoiled the hell out of me at Christmas. My whole family did. I guess I've become an Adult in some ways. Because I tell everyone not to get me presents, mostly because I am a single mom and I can't afford to get everyone gifts. But it's more that that. I am honestly happy just being able to spend an evening with my friends, hanging out with everyone is gift enough for me. I like seeing everyone happy and joking around and that is enough present for me. These quiet moments in the morning and late at night, I sit alone in the living room and the apartment is all mine I get to look at my Christmas Tree. The past 2 years have been financially bad and Christmas was no exception so I haven't had my usual decorations. But this year I could and that to me is my Merry Christmas. Seeing my tree all decorated pretty, with my shiny pink, purple and green balls and our special ornaments that are indicitive of our differing personalities. That makes me happy, really really. I'm almost sad that it will end and I'll have to take it down because my living room looks so nice!
Enough with the happy. Recently as all have been aware, I went on a mission to find me a relationship. Those that know me well enough, you will rejoice in the knowledge that I have thrown this mission in the trash where it belongs! Seriously, enough of that bullshit I'm so insanely over that crap. I know that Big Dave, Fred, Dave, Garcia and Darius will have something to say as soon as I post this once they read this little blurb that I'm about to write. I tried to present a more demure, less aggressive, cuddlier Bex in my quest for a significant other(Yep gonna catch Hell for that one line) But do you know what that got me? That got me 3 different sets of games being played, 1 ass monkey that truly underestimated how much I see through bullshit, blown off by 2 different guys and 1 idiot savant stalker. Really?? Seriously?? Now I admit that I brought a lot of this on myself by trying to be a subdued Bex, so in the general pool of twats that I had I could understand how they would make the mistake of thinking that I was just another girl like any other. But little do they know, I'm not. I'm Bex. Here's what I've discovered in my undercover work (that's what we're deluding ourselves into believing this was) I discovered that in the demographic of men on dating sites and in the general public ages 25-40, there are actually no men at all. It's all boys, not men. Finding Men in this demographic is equivalent to finding the golden ticket! There's the one group of boys that say they're looking for the a relationship but they treat every female like a trick, the group that's out to find someone but can't help playing head games, the group that wants to ask about marriage on the first date, the group that would love to meet you but then never make plans to, and the group that sees the potential in a girl and then promptly runs away. How does anyone find someone in that hot mess?? This whole demographic is nothing but a bunch of boys playing little boy games with no respect for themselves or anyone else. I don't have time for all that crap. I think I'm happier writing snarkey, cynical crap about all of you couples rather than trying to join your ranks!
Stupid crap that New York State does, or why my dead ex-husband is getting notices at my address. Now I'm sure this happens in every state but I live in NY and this happened here. A few months ago I got a letter from NYS Child Support Enforcement stating that after 4 years they were going after my ex-husband full force for support. I called and left a message on their little hot line and then sent them an email notifying them of Michael's death. 2 weeks later I got another letter from them stating that they would update their records and then I notice that they sent a letter addressed to Michael. In the letter they tell him basically that he owes $5,000 in support and this is unacceptable however your deceased so we'll let it go. Yesterday I get a letter to Michael notifying him that the warrant and lien against him is being dismissed because he's deceased! So let's all get this straight in our heads and try to make sense of this. NYS is notifying a DEAD guy that he owes child support but they're dismissing it because he's DEAD and they're notifying the DEAD guy by mail. Congratulations tax payers, there's your money! And it's not like this is a one time thing, this has gone on for months!
Till next time Faithful Readers,
BEX
Monday, December 13, 2010
Old Man's Garage or Bella's Second Home
As everyone knows from following me on Facebook and Twitter and Myspace, my little Chevy Blazer Bella is a pain in my ass. I've sunk more money into the truck than I paid for her a year ago by threefold. Why do I keep doing this you ask? 2 very simple reasons, 1. I don't have the upfront cash to buy another vehicle and 2. It's become my obsession to not let this truck beat me. I will own this truck for as long as I live because of that second reason and I'm not joking. It's become an all out cat fight between her and I and I haven't lost to another bitch yet! I don't plan on starting now.
I was having problems with her this summer and I brought Bella down to my friend Nate who in turn took me down the road to an auto shop owned by a friend of his family. Nate vouched for me and the owner took pity and worked out a payment plan to get my truck fixed. Since that day Bella has gone to no other auto shop.
The shop is called "Old Man's Garage". It's a small 2 bay shop with a tiny office/waiting area that's usually packed to capacity with customers, mechanics, friends of the shop and owner. There's always a fresh hot pot of coffee on and if you ask nicely and the guys like you they may just tell you where they hide the styrofoam coffee cups. At any given time you walk in, some of the guys are bickering and they are always throwing good natured jibes at each other, there are raunchy jokes being tossed back and forth about each others mom, wife, girlfriend or imaginary gay lover. There's always a conversation about racing, generally 1/4 mile drag but every now and again they'll fade into other types.
The owner is Shorty. A very literal nickname as he's roughly a foot shorter than anyone else at the shop however, a bigger man you have never encountered. No person that I have had the pleasure of meeting in this world has a bigger heart, is as honorable, loyal, loving, caring, sympathetic. I can't find the words to describe what a wonderful light Shorty has and is in this world. You see I'm nothing to Shorty, he doesn't know my family and I know none of his. I am a friend of his friends son, just any other girl off the street. He owes me nothing. Yet Shorty continually goes out of his way to make sure that my Bella is running tip top, he works with me on payments if I can't pay my bill all up front which is usually the case since the damn truck can't break when I get paid! He always makes me and Bella a priority because he knows that I have to wait for her and tries to ensure that the office is just a bit warmer when I'm there. He does little things like this to make it just a bit more comfy when I'm there and I think he hopes that no one notices because it would embarrass him for someone to see his little gestures of affection. He has to wear hearing aids and if you ask any man in that shop, it's selective hearing that he suffers from because he may not hear you talking if the shop is loud but damned if he can't hear you screwing up or screwing off over all that noise! And he can hear American Muscle coming from miles away in the Summer! He lives to race in the warmer months so don't try to bring your vehicle in on a Saturday or Sunday when it's nice because you won't find Shorty there, he's already at the track with his babies. Walk in to the shop office and look up on the walls and you will see his collection of pictures and some of his trophies. His heart and soul are in those pictures with him and in his trophies.
I don't know everyone's names, I'm horrible with names. There's always 5 guys or more just hanging out having coffee, smoking cigarettes and joking back and forth. Some before work but most are retired or self employed. At first glance they are an intimidating, gnarly group of roughnecks and their mere presence discourages any trouble from occurring on Shorty's property. The mechanics don't look any different than mechanics at any small neighborhood auto shop in any town or city but they go above and beyond expectations and always work their automotive magic on anything that comes in that lot. Every person there is hospitable and kind but it takes them seeing that your a regular, loyal customer before you truly get accepted and only after a nod of okay from "Dad" as they sometimes call Shorty.
I may bitch exceedingly about my truck having to go to get repaired but I love sitting in that little room. I love listening to the insults, the jokes, the stories. Just being in the presence of those men is an amazing feeling to me, watching them and listening to every thing happening. The feeling of camaraderie between them, the brotherhood and equality they have is enormous and fills the room even if there are only 2 people there. I love that they share their jokes with me and include me in on them, they feel comfortable enough to make jokes at my expense usually sexual in nature but never disrespectful or mean. They love to pick on me for being such a pain in the ass, trouble finding little girl. During the summer months it's a constant quest to see my tits, knowing that I won't give in and knowing that they can get away with it because it's me. Any other woman walks into that office and they all attempt to clean up their language and act with the highest level of respect as that woman is someone's mother, sister, wife. She will walk in and immediately be offered a seat on the couch and a cup of coffee (or not depending on the previous statement about the artfully hidden cups) the perfect example happening today as a woman and her small daughter came in and a seat was instantly found for them, the swearing was at a minimum and the smoking ceased. She was in and out in no time at all. I don't doubt for one second that if I were having a problem, in trouble or in any danger that any one of those guys wouldn't help me. I have the utmost respect for Shorty, his mechanics and his friends and for once I wish I had the words to give that feeling from me to them and not just these inadequate, every day words. I wish I could just show them inside my heart so that they would all know that they have my respect, love, friendship and gratitude. It's not easy being a single mom, working, taking care of my mom and everything else that falls on my small shoulders but these men take away the stress of my vehicles care off my shoulders and make me forget my troubles when I'm there. We all go to Shorty's Old Man's Garage for that reason I think, to relax and forget our troubles for just a moment in time.
So Thank You, Shorty. Thank you guy's in the garage and thank you to all that are sitting in the office. From the deepest part of my heart, Thank You for everything and for being you. Oh one more thing, damn it Shorty it's a 1997 Blazer not a 99!!!
BEX
I was having problems with her this summer and I brought Bella down to my friend Nate who in turn took me down the road to an auto shop owned by a friend of his family. Nate vouched for me and the owner took pity and worked out a payment plan to get my truck fixed. Since that day Bella has gone to no other auto shop.
The shop is called "Old Man's Garage". It's a small 2 bay shop with a tiny office/waiting area that's usually packed to capacity with customers, mechanics, friends of the shop and owner. There's always a fresh hot pot of coffee on and if you ask nicely and the guys like you they may just tell you where they hide the styrofoam coffee cups. At any given time you walk in, some of the guys are bickering and they are always throwing good natured jibes at each other, there are raunchy jokes being tossed back and forth about each others mom, wife, girlfriend or imaginary gay lover. There's always a conversation about racing, generally 1/4 mile drag but every now and again they'll fade into other types.
The owner is Shorty. A very literal nickname as he's roughly a foot shorter than anyone else at the shop however, a bigger man you have never encountered. No person that I have had the pleasure of meeting in this world has a bigger heart, is as honorable, loyal, loving, caring, sympathetic. I can't find the words to describe what a wonderful light Shorty has and is in this world. You see I'm nothing to Shorty, he doesn't know my family and I know none of his. I am a friend of his friends son, just any other girl off the street. He owes me nothing. Yet Shorty continually goes out of his way to make sure that my Bella is running tip top, he works with me on payments if I can't pay my bill all up front which is usually the case since the damn truck can't break when I get paid! He always makes me and Bella a priority because he knows that I have to wait for her and tries to ensure that the office is just a bit warmer when I'm there. He does little things like this to make it just a bit more comfy when I'm there and I think he hopes that no one notices because it would embarrass him for someone to see his little gestures of affection. He has to wear hearing aids and if you ask any man in that shop, it's selective hearing that he suffers from because he may not hear you talking if the shop is loud but damned if he can't hear you screwing up or screwing off over all that noise! And he can hear American Muscle coming from miles away in the Summer! He lives to race in the warmer months so don't try to bring your vehicle in on a Saturday or Sunday when it's nice because you won't find Shorty there, he's already at the track with his babies. Walk in to the shop office and look up on the walls and you will see his collection of pictures and some of his trophies. His heart and soul are in those pictures with him and in his trophies.
I don't know everyone's names, I'm horrible with names. There's always 5 guys or more just hanging out having coffee, smoking cigarettes and joking back and forth. Some before work but most are retired or self employed. At first glance they are an intimidating, gnarly group of roughnecks and their mere presence discourages any trouble from occurring on Shorty's property. The mechanics don't look any different than mechanics at any small neighborhood auto shop in any town or city but they go above and beyond expectations and always work their automotive magic on anything that comes in that lot. Every person there is hospitable and kind but it takes them seeing that your a regular, loyal customer before you truly get accepted and only after a nod of okay from "Dad" as they sometimes call Shorty.
I may bitch exceedingly about my truck having to go to get repaired but I love sitting in that little room. I love listening to the insults, the jokes, the stories. Just being in the presence of those men is an amazing feeling to me, watching them and listening to every thing happening. The feeling of camaraderie between them, the brotherhood and equality they have is enormous and fills the room even if there are only 2 people there. I love that they share their jokes with me and include me in on them, they feel comfortable enough to make jokes at my expense usually sexual in nature but never disrespectful or mean. They love to pick on me for being such a pain in the ass, trouble finding little girl. During the summer months it's a constant quest to see my tits, knowing that I won't give in and knowing that they can get away with it because it's me. Any other woman walks into that office and they all attempt to clean up their language and act with the highest level of respect as that woman is someone's mother, sister, wife. She will walk in and immediately be offered a seat on the couch and a cup of coffee (or not depending on the previous statement about the artfully hidden cups) the perfect example happening today as a woman and her small daughter came in and a seat was instantly found for them, the swearing was at a minimum and the smoking ceased. She was in and out in no time at all. I don't doubt for one second that if I were having a problem, in trouble or in any danger that any one of those guys wouldn't help me. I have the utmost respect for Shorty, his mechanics and his friends and for once I wish I had the words to give that feeling from me to them and not just these inadequate, every day words. I wish I could just show them inside my heart so that they would all know that they have my respect, love, friendship and gratitude. It's not easy being a single mom, working, taking care of my mom and everything else that falls on my small shoulders but these men take away the stress of my vehicles care off my shoulders and make me forget my troubles when I'm there. We all go to Shorty's Old Man's Garage for that reason I think, to relax and forget our troubles for just a moment in time.
So Thank You, Shorty. Thank you guy's in the garage and thank you to all that are sitting in the office. From the deepest part of my heart, Thank You for everything and for being you. Oh one more thing, damn it Shorty it's a 1997 Blazer not a 99!!!
BEX
Friday, December 10, 2010
Why I don't like winter in CNY
There are a multitude of reasons to hate winter in Central New York. But here we are just going to explore my self involved reasons for this hatred.
1. It's killing my social life. Every time I want to do something or I want "Company" it snows like a bitch and no one wants to come out and play!
2. Hats. I love hats!! I'm always wearing hats and I have so many of them it's outrageous. I also have sunglasses to match every single one of my hats, not joking I have coordinated sunglass and hat sets, really really. But here's where I take issue with the hats. I can't style my hair if I'm going to wear a hat because the hat smooshes my hair down so that it's not spiky, even with the evil glue anything together Garnier Gel that I use. And if I don't style my hair and wear a hat it makes my short hair mold to my head so that I look like a cancer patient! Wtf is it with cold weather that makes my hair go all weird? Now I either have to let my little noggin freeze to look cute or just consign myself to wearing a hat for a full day and pray to god there's no occasion to warrant it's removal from my flat hair.
3. No one on the planet looks good in this many layers of clothing! And you can't see not 1 of my damn tattoo's, I look normal eeeewwwwwwwww!!!!!
4. I hate being inside this much but I hate the outside more at this time of year. Seriously, I can't stand being cooped up but my sincere all encompassing hatred for being cold and wet beats the dislike for being cooped up every time.
5. Being single in the winter sucks. If you have a partner it's awesome! There's the anticipation of snuggling close under the blanket and watching TV or the fun stuff that can happen under the blanket or the fun stuff that happens after the fun stuff under the blanket! There's hot cocoa with them and fun stuff snuggled under blankets and fun stuff after the fun stuff under the blankets. Ok so I'm a bit preoccupied with the blanket, do you get my point? There's no fun or fun under blankets if your single. And I don't know about all the other single people but it makes me hostile as fuck! It's like adding insult to injury in the thousandth fold.
6. The unending wet spot on the floor that you never see till you step in it in your socks. It doesn't matter if you take your shoes off at the door. That melting snow will find it's way to the middle of the floor somehow and lay in wait for you to come walking through in your socks and attack! And it ALWAYS happens once your little sock feet are dry! Never freaking fails. I hate having wet socks, I don't like things touching my feet and I can't stand stepping on or in things. So the whole wet spot on the floor, I'm guessing bothers me more than most other people.
7. It sucks having something go wrong with your vehicle and no guy to stand in the cold to fix it for you. True story, the other day my battery was going dead and I went to Autozone to get a replacement because it was under warranty. I didn't realize the parts guys couldn't take it out and I'm deathly afraid of the battery because of an unfortunate event from my past. All the guy customers heard what was going on and there was a particularly cute guy that kept staring at me and smiling. Don't ya know the cute guy started to speak, looked outside at the snow avalanching out of the sky and the wind blowing and promptly shut his mouth smiled and walked out. You could see the thought process! It went something like this " Wow she's cute, wouldn't mind getting to see her naked. Oh wait she needs help, here's my chance. Nope it's snowing and cold fuck that maybe I'll see her in the summer." So I had to call Steven to come rescue me but he was already back home in Auburn so it was a bit of a wait. If there were a guy significant other this wouldn't have been an issue.
8. Falling. Ice and snow are not a friend to the uncoordinated. Anyone that knows me knows that I have a serious inability to stay upright for too long, especially on a flat stable surface. I trip over air and gravity checks me every 5 minutes or so. I spend the 6 months of winter falling on my ass continually and usually in front of either a cute guy or a crowd. Or if I look really cute, if it's a cute day then I'm destined to fall down epically.
9. Driving becomes it's own Olympic winter sport. It's impossible to drive normal in this weather I get that. But then you come across those assholes that want to come to a complete fucking stop on an icy bridge on 81 from 55 mph to let in an idiot who got in the wrong lane and would've waited to get over but this jackass just caused 5 people behind him heart attacks because stopping fast in the winter is no longer an option.
10. Every single person in Central New York is in an epic foul mood because of 1 or more of the above listed reasons or one of those that I chose not to list such as snow plows, shoveling or frozen snot. We are a pretty aggressive and angry lot anyways but winter just brings out the worst in us. Every where you go there is a homicidal person on the brink.
Ok those are my reasons for hating winter here, thanks for letting me vent. I'm gonna go find that asshole that made me stop on 81 or the jackass from the parts store and beat them bloody now.
Till next time faithful readers,
BEX
5.
1. It's killing my social life. Every time I want to do something or I want "Company" it snows like a bitch and no one wants to come out and play!
2. Hats. I love hats!! I'm always wearing hats and I have so many of them it's outrageous. I also have sunglasses to match every single one of my hats, not joking I have coordinated sunglass and hat sets, really really. But here's where I take issue with the hats. I can't style my hair if I'm going to wear a hat because the hat smooshes my hair down so that it's not spiky, even with the evil glue anything together Garnier Gel that I use. And if I don't style my hair and wear a hat it makes my short hair mold to my head so that I look like a cancer patient! Wtf is it with cold weather that makes my hair go all weird? Now I either have to let my little noggin freeze to look cute or just consign myself to wearing a hat for a full day and pray to god there's no occasion to warrant it's removal from my flat hair.
3. No one on the planet looks good in this many layers of clothing! And you can't see not 1 of my damn tattoo's, I look normal eeeewwwwwwwww!!!!!
4. I hate being inside this much but I hate the outside more at this time of year. Seriously, I can't stand being cooped up but my sincere all encompassing hatred for being cold and wet beats the dislike for being cooped up every time.
5. Being single in the winter sucks. If you have a partner it's awesome! There's the anticipation of snuggling close under the blanket and watching TV or the fun stuff that can happen under the blanket or the fun stuff that happens after the fun stuff under the blanket! There's hot cocoa with them and fun stuff snuggled under blankets and fun stuff after the fun stuff under the blankets. Ok so I'm a bit preoccupied with the blanket, do you get my point? There's no fun or fun under blankets if your single. And I don't know about all the other single people but it makes me hostile as fuck! It's like adding insult to injury in the thousandth fold.
6. The unending wet spot on the floor that you never see till you step in it in your socks. It doesn't matter if you take your shoes off at the door. That melting snow will find it's way to the middle of the floor somehow and lay in wait for you to come walking through in your socks and attack! And it ALWAYS happens once your little sock feet are dry! Never freaking fails. I hate having wet socks, I don't like things touching my feet and I can't stand stepping on or in things. So the whole wet spot on the floor, I'm guessing bothers me more than most other people.
7. It sucks having something go wrong with your vehicle and no guy to stand in the cold to fix it for you. True story, the other day my battery was going dead and I went to Autozone to get a replacement because it was under warranty. I didn't realize the parts guys couldn't take it out and I'm deathly afraid of the battery because of an unfortunate event from my past. All the guy customers heard what was going on and there was a particularly cute guy that kept staring at me and smiling. Don't ya know the cute guy started to speak, looked outside at the snow avalanching out of the sky and the wind blowing and promptly shut his mouth smiled and walked out. You could see the thought process! It went something like this " Wow she's cute, wouldn't mind getting to see her naked. Oh wait she needs help, here's my chance. Nope it's snowing and cold fuck that maybe I'll see her in the summer." So I had to call Steven to come rescue me but he was already back home in Auburn so it was a bit of a wait. If there were a guy significant other this wouldn't have been an issue.
8. Falling. Ice and snow are not a friend to the uncoordinated. Anyone that knows me knows that I have a serious inability to stay upright for too long, especially on a flat stable surface. I trip over air and gravity checks me every 5 minutes or so. I spend the 6 months of winter falling on my ass continually and usually in front of either a cute guy or a crowd. Or if I look really cute, if it's a cute day then I'm destined to fall down epically.
9. Driving becomes it's own Olympic winter sport. It's impossible to drive normal in this weather I get that. But then you come across those assholes that want to come to a complete fucking stop on an icy bridge on 81 from 55 mph to let in an idiot who got in the wrong lane and would've waited to get over but this jackass just caused 5 people behind him heart attacks because stopping fast in the winter is no longer an option.
10. Every single person in Central New York is in an epic foul mood because of 1 or more of the above listed reasons or one of those that I chose not to list such as snow plows, shoveling or frozen snot. We are a pretty aggressive and angry lot anyways but winter just brings out the worst in us. Every where you go there is a homicidal person on the brink.
Ok those are my reasons for hating winter here, thanks for letting me vent. I'm gonna go find that asshole that made me stop on 81 or the jackass from the parts store and beat them bloody now.
Till next time faithful readers,
BEX
5.
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
It's been a minute? Feels like a lifetime.
I haven't written in a week and a half, my apologies. Although it probably seems much longer to me than the people I annoy by constantly posting about my blog, lol! I've honestly had a bunch of ideas for blogs but every time I've sat to write it hasn't flowed as it usually does. I've been trying to figure out why it hasn't been coming to me and then I realized I was trying too hard to find things of interest to you. That's where I fucked up, to put it bluntly. Not that I don't care about what you would like to read here, please don't ever think that! But this is my blog page and generally your here reading this because of an active interest in me, the funny way that my mind works or my strange little perceptions of the world around me. So I'm sitting at the laptop and just writing what ever comes into my mind. If your bored by this, go away. Seriously, there's the door, use it. If intrigued about where this little path goes then let us link arms and adventure in together ;)
Dating sites are not necessarily working out for me I think. I'm fast getting frustrated and bored with that particular experience. I always say "Try everything twice, that way your sure you either like or dislike it." Well this was the second time that I tried it and yeah, not so much. Pretty sure that I don't like it. Now I'm not completely lost on it, I've met a couple cool people. But for the 4 cool people that I've met, I've gotten 400 bad experiences. I still want to know what kind of "Science" they're using. I don't consider random a science and that seems to be their method,lol. And I haven't heard or seen anything from my 7ft knitting, polka dancing Muslim lately either, oh how my dreams of true love are shattered by this!! Prince Charming has run away, what ever shall I do??
Ya know what I don't get at all? How come it's so hard to meet someone? I don't mean like "Meeting someone" I mean like how come it's so hard to chat someone up and then get them to either agree to a meet or get them to ask you out if they are obviously interested? What's that about?? Your interested, I'm interested, let's get together have a cup of coffee or a beer we will see where it goes from there but let's at least get that first step out of the way!! This is my way of thinking about it: Ok we've chatted, there's an active interest in each other as far as your breathing, I'm breathing and it doesn't seem to annoy either of us. Let's get the meet and greet out of the way so that I can figure out if I potentially want to fuck you or have a beer with you or both. Because, yes this is honestly how I categorize people in my head and I'm not happy until I figure out where your place is in my mind. Also I like to figure this out rather quickly because then I can either expend my energy or conserve it depending on your category. Your honestly not paying any attention to what I'm saying, your sitting there trying to figure out what category I've got you in, aren't you?? LOOK RABID BUNNIES.... okay now that your back to paying attention to me.
I was thinking earlier this week about love. I was looking at everyone around me and I was honestly wondering why we are constantly searching for love when all it does is cause confusion, pain and financial woes out the ass. The human race is nothing but a bunch of freakin lemmings, man. We see the precipice and just go right on running for the edge as fast as our little lemming legs will take us! I watch my friends that are in seemingly happy relationships but it's honestly one sided. I watch couples that put on the happy facade but both are miserable. And then I see the largest group of people. The ones that have had their hearts broken into millions of pieces, the ones that love has destroyed completely, the devastated majority.
We say we aren't looking for love. We cover it up with clever little lies and pretty little cliches but it all comes down to the simple fact that we are still searching for someone to share time with. We aren't lemmings, we're junkies. We jones for that feeling of being with someone, the butterflies when your first meeting, the tingles on your lips from the first kisses, the euphoria and dizziness of closeness. Because with that person the past is erased and right then there are endless possibilities and it's physically, emotionally intoxicating. It's delicious that level of intoxication. I honestly don't look for someone to spend forever with and all that jazz. I go out actively looking for the guy that makes my lips tingle and makes me dizzy. That to me is much more interesting. After thinking of it that way, it made me temporarily less cynical about love. Give me a couple days and I'll be back to my usual self lol!
I'm really hating this weeks snow storm here in NY. Not because it's a bitch to drive in, not because it's cold, not because I have to warm up the truck 20 minutes before I want to go anywhere. These are all very valid reasons however my self involved reason that I hate winter is because it's hindering my social patterns. Nobody wants to come out and play!! I'm bored out of my mind and no one will come occupy my time. No one wants to go out and have drinks or do anything. Wtf is that? I can't live like this for the next 6 months! It's been 2 days and already I feel like a minute is an eternity. I'm gonna go crazy by 1 January! All work, no play equals a bloggin Bex. So for your own sanity, it's in your best interest to amuse me lol. Especially now that all my fave tv shows are on hiatus, this is going to give me ALLOT of free time!
Alright faithful readers, my attention span has..look something shiny!!!
BEX
Dating sites are not necessarily working out for me I think. I'm fast getting frustrated and bored with that particular experience. I always say "Try everything twice, that way your sure you either like or dislike it." Well this was the second time that I tried it and yeah, not so much. Pretty sure that I don't like it. Now I'm not completely lost on it, I've met a couple cool people. But for the 4 cool people that I've met, I've gotten 400 bad experiences. I still want to know what kind of "Science" they're using. I don't consider random a science and that seems to be their method,lol. And I haven't heard or seen anything from my 7ft knitting, polka dancing Muslim lately either, oh how my dreams of true love are shattered by this!! Prince Charming has run away, what ever shall I do??
Ya know what I don't get at all? How come it's so hard to meet someone? I don't mean like "Meeting someone" I mean like how come it's so hard to chat someone up and then get them to either agree to a meet or get them to ask you out if they are obviously interested? What's that about?? Your interested, I'm interested, let's get together have a cup of coffee or a beer we will see where it goes from there but let's at least get that first step out of the way!! This is my way of thinking about it: Ok we've chatted, there's an active interest in each other as far as your breathing, I'm breathing and it doesn't seem to annoy either of us. Let's get the meet and greet out of the way so that I can figure out if I potentially want to fuck you or have a beer with you or both. Because, yes this is honestly how I categorize people in my head and I'm not happy until I figure out where your place is in my mind. Also I like to figure this out rather quickly because then I can either expend my energy or conserve it depending on your category. Your honestly not paying any attention to what I'm saying, your sitting there trying to figure out what category I've got you in, aren't you?? LOOK RABID BUNNIES.... okay now that your back to paying attention to me.
I was thinking earlier this week about love. I was looking at everyone around me and I was honestly wondering why we are constantly searching for love when all it does is cause confusion, pain and financial woes out the ass. The human race is nothing but a bunch of freakin lemmings, man. We see the precipice and just go right on running for the edge as fast as our little lemming legs will take us! I watch my friends that are in seemingly happy relationships but it's honestly one sided. I watch couples that put on the happy facade but both are miserable. And then I see the largest group of people. The ones that have had their hearts broken into millions of pieces, the ones that love has destroyed completely, the devastated majority.
We say we aren't looking for love. We cover it up with clever little lies and pretty little cliches but it all comes down to the simple fact that we are still searching for someone to share time with. We aren't lemmings, we're junkies. We jones for that feeling of being with someone, the butterflies when your first meeting, the tingles on your lips from the first kisses, the euphoria and dizziness of closeness. Because with that person the past is erased and right then there are endless possibilities and it's physically, emotionally intoxicating. It's delicious that level of intoxication. I honestly don't look for someone to spend forever with and all that jazz. I go out actively looking for the guy that makes my lips tingle and makes me dizzy. That to me is much more interesting. After thinking of it that way, it made me temporarily less cynical about love. Give me a couple days and I'll be back to my usual self lol!
I'm really hating this weeks snow storm here in NY. Not because it's a bitch to drive in, not because it's cold, not because I have to warm up the truck 20 minutes before I want to go anywhere. These are all very valid reasons however my self involved reason that I hate winter is because it's hindering my social patterns. Nobody wants to come out and play!! I'm bored out of my mind and no one will come occupy my time. No one wants to go out and have drinks or do anything. Wtf is that? I can't live like this for the next 6 months! It's been 2 days and already I feel like a minute is an eternity. I'm gonna go crazy by 1 January! All work, no play equals a bloggin Bex. So for your own sanity, it's in your best interest to amuse me lol. Especially now that all my fave tv shows are on hiatus, this is going to give me ALLOT of free time!
Alright faithful readers, my attention span has..look something shiny!!!
BEX
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