I know that you've been hanging in suspense concerning the fate of the squirrels in my ceiling. Rest easy Faithful Readers, both squirrel armies have survived to fight another day much to my dismay. Was searching for a subject yesterday and I came across something that made me laugh until my sides hurt! Everyone remember the actor Kirk Cameron from the show Growing Pains? I was never into the show or the guy to be honest I thought both were cheesy as hell. I was doing a bit of research on the web concerning the scary amount of mass animal deaths across the world recently and there was the glowing nugget of happiness in bold script on CNN! Now I'll give you a bit of back story to help you out. Somewhere along the line Kirk Cameron found religion and became a born again christian. He's spent the past couple of years starring in the Left Behind series movie adaptions. I like that series, it was very well written however no wish to see the movies because Mr. Cameron is in it. Kirk took it 15 steps further, he became an Evangelist and now has a religious TV show and runs around the Globe preaching. Anderson Cooper was doing the story on CNN about the mass animal deaths and called in a Religious Expert to comment on if this is in fact a sign of the Apocalypse. Who was the "Religious Expert" you ask? Kirk freakin Cameron. All the respect I had for Anderson Cooper disappeared in a cloud of bad 80's sitcom dust. Of all the respected, educated, intelligent Religious Leaders on this planet, Anderson Cooper's "Expert" is a failed actor? At least go the successful actor route and call in the Scientologists! I can at least respect their brand of crazy. First off, I do not buy the whole "This thing happens all the time but now our news travels faster" excuse about the mass animal deaths. And I really don't buy that flocks of thousands of birds are all crashing into fireworks all across the globe in a weeks time as being normal, nor do I buy the whole fish and crustaceans dropping dead on beaches as being normal either. I wasn't buying any of this candy coated shit to begin with but when a respected news source pulls in a cheesy actor/evangelist as their "Expert" NOW I know something is shady is happening in the world! Get your Zombie/Apocalypse plans together Faithful Readers, we may have to use them!!!
This is kind of a two parter here. Self Awareness and funny stuff I noticed at the bar last night. I had to laugh because I noticed an interesting social anomaly last night, we've all noticed that girls travel in packs and that pack ALWAYS has 1 fat and/or ugly girl that one of your buddies is going to get stuck with for which you will owe him a massive debt. But have you ever noticed that short people travel in packs also? Yep, little groups of people 5ft 4in and shorter roll in tiny smurf packs AND every 3rd one has 1 tall person! I'm not making this up! Really, seriously! Short people travel in clusters and pack 1 tall guy/girl for backup it would seem. Now when I go out I always pack 3 or 4 big guys and 2 or 3 smaller guys that are scrappy as fuck so you underestimate them and are dumb enough to go after the big guys. I NEVER travel in packs of short people because then the attention wouldn't be immediately focused on ME! And let's be real Readers I've said it time and again, I am a self involved creature first and foremost. I got a big giggle out of watching the Smurf Packs circulate the place. They had tiny migration paths that they followed and of course my imagination took this to the next level and I kept waiting for the tiny little packs to wander too close to the packs of taller people and just have 1 of the taller peoples heads turn into a T-Rex and snatch one of the helpless smurfs out of their pack. I have a brilliantly vivid imagination.
Okay, so there was one rather odd moment that happened last night and it slightly knocked me off balance at first. I had a girl start gushing on me in the ladies room about my Pink hair, not that odd I always get that one person that is awed by my hair and ink. No, this chica kept finding me lmao. Here's the part that kind of at first made me laugh (A LOT) then made me stop and think. This little girl was pretty sexy, tight little body, pretty face, amazing eyes, silky voice. I personally put her in the "Pretty People" category. The 2 guys I was with both were brought to attention when she wandered amongst us (would've been ashamed if they hadn't) and started the endless stream of how much she admired me for having the nerve to pull of this look and how she wished she could do it. I went back inside and she soon followed with one of my guys and I had to laugh because she just turned to me and started her endless chatter again. It took me off guard because most women despise me, this one for whatever reason decided she liked my world and was going to be in it. Cam thought it was funnier than hell. In the middle of her rant about how cool she thought I was for having the balls to look like I do, I of course went into my usual inner monologue about how this isn't a "look" damn it! This is ME, outward expression of inward personality!! I don't do this to look cool, Pink hair is a pain in the ass! 22 Tattoo's is a pain in the ass! I don't "do" it at all, it just IS, it's just me. That being said, I had a moment of self awareness. A bunch of you, I grew up with or have known since high school. That group sometimes remembers me being a wee bit quieter and less inclined to be the center of attention. That was the group that were more acquaintances then close friends. And then there's some of you that met me on my journey to self awareness but not quite there yet. I strongly credit my experience as an exotic dancer for making me fully aware of who I am. There were other paths that gave me strength, courage, honor, loyalty along the way. But by being "Tyler" for so long I really got comfortable with me and found the ability to let all aspects of my personality come together and shine rather than repress parts of it. By letting "Tyler" infiltrate "Becky" we got the "Bex" that stands before you today, Faithful Readers! An individual that will neither conform or bow to another, a free roaming agent of chaos, victim of Murphy, outspoken, loving yet self centered creature that believes in keeping it real and has faith in herself and her friends, I will love you and be there for you till the end of time.
It only takes one step forward towards self awareness to make you the individual that you long to be!
Till next time, Faithful Readers,
BEX!
No comments:
Post a Comment